Blue Mountains
Wind and sun hollowed the flesh until there was nothing left except bark and bone. A year later and there I was, a growing child, holding its flaking skull in my hands, my treasure. Cold damp air formed a mist that kept my parents out of view as I ran back to the house, placing the skull on the concrete step. This was a way out place. I don’t remember how we got there, or why, it wasn’t a house for a holiday but it was made for escape. I remember my hair tied in knots over my head, held in place with strips of fabric ripped from an old pillowcase. I remember the bat above my bed. I remember the kangaroo skull. I remember burning my fingers holding its tooth over a candle.
Hi Louisa!
I loved this creative piece because I could tell what you experienced has impacted your life. Memories recollect like the way you describe; “I remember the bat above my bed. I remember the kangaroo skull. I remember burning my fingers holding its tooth over a candle.” I really loved this work and the image accompanying it.
To briefly note I am unsure how I feel about the word ‘hollowed’ in the context you are using it. Despite this just keep an eye on grammatical errors such as commas. For example, “Cold, damp air formed a mist…” and “it wasn’t a house for a holiday, but it was made for escape.” In this sentence also it might be worth cutting into two sentences. The imagery from your recollection was astounding and I look forward to reading more of your critical and creative works!
P.S. You might need to categorise your works too!
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